Another great one from the up and coming Blogger Dishy Divorcee. I adore this lady and her blog.
Crap I can’t make up: red flags to on-line dating
Ladies, take a deep breath. I’m about to let you in on a little secret. The hottie with the user name CupidCasanova in NYC – DOES NOT EXIST. I know, at first glance, your self-esteem likely sky rocketed when the message popped up: “he’s interested!” You’ve been misled. One of two things is probably happening: 1, his greasy sausage fingers are mousing over your image while he touches himself inappropriately or 2, he is a desperate, 60-year-old agoraphobic playing a big, fat joke on single ladies across America.
Drunk & Dating
Another red flag in online dating is the guy who showcases his drinking agility in 10 out of 12 profile pictures. The threshold to his dating interests stop at beer bongs, night clubs, and the probability of getting laid. Sure, it’s nice to know that he has fun with friends and can hold-down a 1.25 liter of Smirnoff, but is vomiting nightly and waking up with your underwear on backwards the way you want to spend your single days? Oh, another clue, this moderate drinker’s favorite pastimes include the gym, hangin’ at a local cigar shop and several 3-day trips to Las Vegas.
Red flag number 3: the man who gets carried away in the “I’m looking for” segment. Recently, I read an actual profile that stated the following:
[ I want a woman who can multitask, a BFF that to confide in & let my guard down totally with. 2. I want a mother to take care of me... 3. I want a seductress or tramp depending on the mood. I want to be wanted & not have to ask for it. 4. Finally, I want a devoted secretary that is there to help whatever the situation & can do it without losing respect in me. I could go on & on like this for pages. What do I pray for? I want a woman who will love me, for who I am.]
He started off on the right track, but then it all went terribly wrong. Did he really use the word secretary? Good luck with that!
Just keepin’ it real,
XXOO Dishy
If you need more tips on how to put up a profile that stands out and brands you online in a positive way you can contact me at this link TalktoLiz I can help you get your love life on track and put your best foot forward while dating online.
Ha! Loved this article! I totally laughed out loud when I read the "I'm looking for" part.
I miss my Dishy friend!!! she was so very funny! Not sure where she went but I adored her work!
Hahaha!!! Wow! And I though I'd come across some interesting profiles online but that one takes the cake! There are tons of red flags I look for and you've captured them here. In addition to the guy who has 10 out of 12 photos of himself pounding pints, I also avoid the guy who only has photos of himself clearly taken in his bathroom mirror. He should at LEAST have ONE friend who is willing to take a picture of him, otherwise he's a no-go for me.
LOL@The mirror pictures. I hate those and IF and I rarely do.. have a client that has a picture from the bathroom mirror I advise them to take it down. Maybe I’m from a different generation but umm there is nothing sexy about the toilet room to me
I don’t want to think about you and what you are up to in that room.
Haha! I love it!!! This is so true and so funny!
Angie recently posted..What’s the one dumb thing you used to believe in?
LOL ..;) it makes me giggle ..;)
I laughed out loud reading this – but it might have been more appropriate to cry! When I was dating, I actually ran across things like this – and more! i can look back and augh now, but it was sure frustrating then!
I don't mean to suggest you should shy away from online dating – I still say online dating is one of the best ways to expose yourself to a lot of potential life partner candidates at one time. You just need to use discretion – just as you would in offline dating. The more you date, the more you easily you learn to spot all of the duds that aren't worth your time.