Being in the dating game often involves an endless sea of dates, some more memorable than others. But, when you are ready to settle down the things you look for in your potential soul mate are subject to change. After all, this is someone you plan to spend the rest of your life with, maybe even have children with. Financially responsible men are very attractive to many women looking for Mr. Right.
Unfortunately women don’t always know what they are looking for. So for all you ladies out there here are a few things that signal you have a financially responsible man; and guys you can use these as a guide for getting your financial house in order. I assure you the ladies love a financially fit man!
Tell Us about your Debt
The first date is certainly not the time to reveal your financial skeletons, but if we are getting serious don’t keep it from us. Women are by nature planners and don’t like to be ambushed by say a $10,000 credit card bill you racked up before we met. Not only do we want to know about it, we want to know that you have a plan to pay it off.
This may include:
- An aggressive personal debt re-payment plan. This means paying more than the minimum payment each month, extra when you can, and a clearly defined budget that you stick to. We’ll understand if an island vacation, expensive dinners, and gifts aren’t in the cards right now.
- Debt consolidation. Perhaps you join a plan that consolidates all of your unsecured debts into one affordable payment. You took the initiative and are aggressively working on your debt.
- Debt settlement. Maybe you are in over your head due to a divorce or medical issue and racked up insurmountable debt and can’t afford to pay it back. Debt Settlement is often more appealing than bankruptcy as it allows you to get back on your feet more quickly.
Have specific long-term goals
You have been out on a few dates, things are starting to get more serious and the conversation goes to the age old question, “Where do you see yourself in 10 years?” This question causes many men to give you the deer in the headlights look and a response of, “I really haven’t thought that far ahead.”
This is a total turnoff for many women looking for someone that is responsible, financially or otherwise. Goals are important, striving to achieve shows ambition.
Financially speaking it is important to set goals for yourself as well. For example:
- I want to save enough money for a down payment on a house.
- I want to have an emergency fund equivalent to 6 months salary.
- I want to have my student loans paid off.
- I want to start a retirement fund.
These are all responses that make women feel more secure; this guy has thought about his future and where he is headed.
Earning Potential is Important
We would like to say that it is not, but even in today’s society where women are thought to be equal we don’t want to support you. It is okay if we earn more, we just don’t want you sitting around the house doing nothing while we are out working. The stigma of having a man as the breadwinner still presents itself in many relationships.
This doesn’t mean that if your passion is teaching pre-school we won’t be attracted to you. Having a passion for your career and confidence is important to us.
The reason we are concerned with your earning potential has more to do with when the time comes to have a family we would like to have the option of at least one of us staying home even if it’s just for a little while with them.
We don’t Care if you keep Up with the Jones’s
Contrary to what you may think we don’t really care what kind of car you drive or that you’re renting an apartment. Now, if you are still living with mom and dad that may be a turnoff.
Here are a few turn-on’s:
- A man that knows how to spend wisely.
- Financial security; no debt, a job, and a savings account.
- A budget.
The bottom line is that we want a man that knows what he wants out of life and has a plan for achieving it. Whether you make six figures or minimum wage we want assurance that you are a hard worker, make smart decisions when it comes to money and know how to treat us even if its flowers picked from the yard, a cheap bottle of wine, and a home cooked meal.
Ladies do you have ways to uncover your date’s financial situation and is it important to you?
Guys how do you show off your financial savvy?
Suzanne is a certified credit counselor and a Social Media Specialist for CareOne Debt Relief Services. Suzanne writes for Divorce, Debt and Finances and A Straight Talk on Debt. Follow Suzanne on Twitter @SuzanneCramer1 and @AskCareOne where she shares her insights on divorce and managing your finances.